Seward Arts Council adds a zesty new addition to an already successful series of 1st Friday Gallery Walks with “Art in Motion” at Seward Playhouse. The playhouse, Seward’s newest venue for live performance, will host a Tribal Fusion Belly Dance show during the art walk August 1st. The show will feature the local dance troupe Luna Dance Circle, as well as guest dancer Joanna Caselli from Anchorage’s premier fusion belly dance company Nomadia (www.nomadiadance.com). Luna Dance Circle director, Lori Angove, says that this form of art is “a creative process that allows you to express yourself through dance.” Angove shares her excitement about her group performing during 1st Friday “to help heighten awareness that dance is, in fact, art…in motion.”
But the fun doesn’t stop Friday evening! In addition to their Friday performance, the group will host a belly dancing workshop on Saturday at APEX Gym from 11-2. The cost is $35 and people interested can register at Seward Playhouse on Friday 6-8pm or call Lori at 362-1404. This is an amazing opportunity to learn an original choreography from professional dance instructor Joanna Caselli. Beginners welcome.
The 1st Friday Art Walk takes place every first Friday of the month between 6 and 8pm, and allows the opportunity to stroll through shops, view and purchase art, chat with artists, and enjoy some refreshments. This Friday’s line-up includes…
Seward Playhouse. 215 #B 4th Ave. 224-ARTS. “Art in Motion.” Luna Dance Circle & Joanna Caselli.
A Flyin’ Skein. 216 4th Ave. Cindy Capra. Tatting, Crochet & Quilt Design.
Ranting Raven. 238 4th Ave. Gail Richards. Acrylic Paintings.
Resurrect Art. 320 3rd Ave. “Outside Inside.” Darla Myers’ Colorful, Whimsical Watermedia.
Resurrection Bay Gallerie. 500 4th Ave. Deland Anderson “Kenai from the Sky” & Melissa’s “Japanese Treasures.”
Softly Silk. 416 4th Ave. Kathy Goodell. Viking Knit Jewelry.
Starbird Studio. 221 4th Ave. Alder Olive. Photos of Exit Glacier.
Taught by Kim Bird, RN
The fall Childbirth Education Class is just around the corner for expecting parents. Topics for the class will include stages of labor, relaxation & breathing techniques, medications & MORE!
When: Saturday August 23, 10 am - 4 pm & Sunday August 24, 2 pm - 6 pm
Where: Legends Building on Washington St.
Cost: $75.00 per couple
This is a valuable class and no one will be turned away if payment can’t be met. Scholarships available.
Please call 224-2836 to register
The valley is warming up and the produce is coming in…Annette will have Organic turnips, Iceberg lettuce, Romaine lettuce, cabbage, tomatoes, cucumbers, potatoes, onions, zucchini, and flower baskets. Of course, there’s also her yummy grilled reindeer, bratwurst and beef sausages. Christy will have her bead work at the market on Thursday and Abby will have her great art. Check out what’s new in the little red house and have some savory nachos. Play music? We’d love to have you come play for us at the market. We’re located at 312 5th Ave., 1/2 block north of the library. Want to set up a booth or have a question? Contact Joanie at 760-815-8498 or thegrazingmoose@gmail.com
CHUGIAK, Alaska, July 30, 2008—Youth aged 6 to 21, from across the state, will have a full camp experience this summer despite the limitations of having forms of muscular dystrophy. Each summer the Muscular Dystrophy Association (MDA) puts on summer camps throughout the United States specifically for campers with neuromuscular diseases.
This year, Alaska’s MDA summer camp will take place the week of August 2-8 at Birchwood Camp in Chugiak. Here campers enjoy dozens of fun group and individual activities ranging from horseback riding to dances, swimming to arts and crafts-all suited to various functioning capabilities. Volunteer counselors work one-on-one with the campers.
There is no cost to the families of attending campers. Generous donations to MDA from local corporations, groups and individuals pay for the per camper fee of $800 dollars.
MDA is a voluntary health organization working to defeat the more than 40 neuromuscular diseases through worldwide research, comprehensive services and far reaching professional and public health education. For more information about MDA Summer Camp or campers in your area, please call Anne Marie Rogers at (971) 244-1290.
This coming Wednesday, August 6, at 6:30, is the final First Wednesday Community Hymn Sing at the United Methodist Church, 321 Fourth Avenue. Join in this hour of singing the old-time favorite Gospel songs with friends from near and far. Mark your calendars so you don’t forget!
The Seward Community Library will be hosting the paintings of renowned local artist Evelyn Blair as part of the First Friday Art Walk, September 9th. We are asking the community for their support by requesting one month loans, of any Evelyn Blair paintings you may have, to be put on display. Please call the Library at 224-4082 if interested. We will be accepting paintings until August 29th. Thank you very much for your support. We hope to fill the walls!
City council packets are ready in the city clerk’s office for pickup. The filing period to run for a city council seat is August 1 through August 15.
The three seats available are: Willard Dunham’s, Jean Bardarson and Linda Amberg.
The Polar Bear Jumpoff Festival needs a logo for the 2009 festival. Draw or sketch up a design by August 30 and mail it to PO Box 386 Seward, Ak 99664. If your design is chosen you will receive a $50.00 savings bond, a 2009 “T” shirt and your name will be mentioned in articles written by us for the media. Contact polarbearseward@yahoo.com if you have questions.
July 28, 2008
Seward, Alaska Sporadic Bird Report
RARE BIRD!
A VERY unusual sighting of a WESTERN KINGBIRD in Seward was first seen here in Seward on July 23 by an alert visiting birder. It is still here as of 10 am today, hunting insects from the chain link fence surrounding the ballfields and playground at the intersection of Ballaine and Fourth Avenue. Also watch for it perched on the power lines.
Look for a bird smaller than a robin perched in the open with a lemon yellow belly, gray back, and black tail. The white outer tail feathers are hard to see because they are worn.
This is the species that ignited Kenn Kaufman’s career as a birder, “Kingbird Highway: The Story of a Natural Obsession That Got a Little Out of Hand.”
Photos attached. Good luck!
Happy Birding!
Carol Griswold
Sporadic Bird Report reporter
Seward, Alaska
The wind has a way of whispering I can’t ignore. A bouquet for the eyes, but ears as well; held aloft in the muted passing of a hundred thundering herds of butterfly sighs, enveloped all in the rapturously chaotic sea of air that travels where it will, touching who it must, and which all the while is calling for someone to answer.
Of tidal power yet pillowed presence, this song aloft will not be swayed, yet swirls about, within, outside my mind. Calling, calling on again. And so I answer. Not with words but action. Tugged from the middle as by some umbilical connection though past and at present, phantom, I move close to the source.
There is water here, softly hidden. Locked in transit. Held in cells. As blood to us, so life to leaves, and thousands present join in rhythm. Some core within my chest is quenched as music flows within me; a sound old beyond reason, shaped by necessity, and yet lovely beyond description.
Perhaps I fail to give pause to that notion. That so much of what is natural offers pleasure. That the finest works of art create a tapestry, free and unhurried, crafted from wood and stone, fiber and feathers. In truth, there are times I firmly believe all the magnificence of the world can be found in a single piece of driftwood or lost for a time in the burnt mosaic of dying leaves, only to appear once more upon the wind. Here, then gone.
As art, isn’t beauty merely a pleasant organization of colors and shapes, touch and textures, whose endless combinations render fresh patterns stirred into our emotional melting pot? Is there a difference in feeling between watching a soft, ocean morning sunrise and gazing into the eyes of the one who holds your heart? It seems, at times, that boundless love for one precise moment in time will exceed description.
This was that moment. Bathed in song from Cottonwood leaves, standing amidst the heady fragrance of the Sitka Rose bushes, I had a feeling. A dancing to The Beatles on a sun-soaked afternoon kind of feeling that filled my whole body with such light and joy that I stood, bereft of thought, running only on emotion, for a time several heartbeats too short.
Perhaps it is foolish to wish to find oneself in such a moment more often, but if peace can provide such alarming clarity, why do we act then so often in anger or resentment? Part of being human I suppose. The Lebanese poet, Khalil Gibran, wrote “the deeper that sorrow carves into our heart, the more joy you can contain.” I find truth in that. We are creatures of habit, capable of becoming accustomed to almost anything, and variety fosters strong emotions. Could love soar to such great heights if in times of sadness we hadn’t once discovered the depths? Tunneled further?
As we go forth from here, let us each try to find that one moment of exhilarating contentment each day that settles our minds for a time, allowing our thoughts to press more often towards returning to such a feeling. If we can approach each new situation with the best of intentions, yet remain realistic in our expectations, we may find we no longer ever need try and be happy, but just are. And that, would be truly something.
It’s no secret that a high-energy session of karaoke brings joy to millions of Japanese citizens. As an exhilarating pastime, it has become a national sensation, capturing the hearts and minds of people all over the country, from all walks of life. And why not? Pretending to be Japanese pop icon Ayumi Hamasaki, even if only for a moment, can be enough to make a dream come true. My stars align when I’m John Denver, but that’s just me.
Even here in Seward though, we do our best to swoon our fellow thirsty customers at certain local establishments now and then. Sometimes they’re amazed. At others, horrified. But above all, it’s about having a good time unleashing your inner diva or dynamo.
But a question looms. Can we, as Americans and relative newcomers to the magic of the “Empty Orchestra”, compete with our Pacific neighbors across the pond? Are there any amongst us brave enough to travel to a faraway place, to the land where karaoke was born? Have we Eagles, bold and true, to challenge the Cranes in a battle of wind and words? The answer to all these questions is yes.
Each year, Seward selects a few of its finest, a handful of heroes, to venture forth on the wings of freedom and friendship to our Japanese sister city, Obihiro. In light of this brave venture, I offer them this book, 101 Favorite Songs Taught in Japanese Schools, to insure that when that microphone comes their way, they’ll be ready.
That’s no jive neither. The hits within this book are true show-stoppers. Guaranteed to represent Seward’s proud history of karaoke greatness while appealing to the sentimental values of the Japanese people. Songs like “Chicks”, “Mountain Monkeys” or “Goldfish taking a Nap” are not only pleasing to the ear, but carry generations of cultural heritage that will be vital in making a good first impression.
But don’t take my word for it. See if you can pick up what I’m puttin’ down with rhymes like these: “How cute the goldfish in a red costume in a sleep, Wake up, wake up, I’ll give you some nice food I keep. How cute the goldfish bubbling out a foam or two, He’s about to wake up from his drowsy dream, too.” Bingo! Nobody can top that. Who would dare try?
Oh, and one final word of advice to our brave voyagers. I know it may be tempting in times of stress, but please, whatever you do, no matter how scary it is up on that stage, don’t attempt “Mr. Roboto”. There’s just so many arigatou’s. Good luck out there, or should I say, genki de ne! Make Seward proud.
Tenth Annual 5K Wildlife Rescue Run / Walk Aug. 2, 2008 Seward, Alaska
Race Day Registration: 9:30-11:30AM
Start Time: 11:15AM (walkers) 12:00PM (runners) Awards Ceremony: 1:45PM
Pre Registration Entry Fee Until Aug. 1:
$20.00/adult (16 & over) $ 15.00/child (5 to 15)
Registration Entry Fee on Race Day:
$25.00/adult (16 & over) $20.00/child (5 to 15)
Registration includes free addmission into the ASLC on race day and a collectors t-shirt
Help support the marine wildlife rehabilitation program! The Alaska SeaLife Center cares for many species of stranded and injured marine birds and mammals. This rehabilitation program depends on financial support from the community in its continuing efforts to treat these animals. Your entry fee will directly benefit the rehabilitation program.
For Information & Entry Form, Contact:
Alaska SeaLife Center c/o Tim Lebling PO Box 1329 Seward, AK 99664
1-800-224-2525 ext. 6399
or go to: alaskasealife.org
The Regulatory Commission of Alaska is accepting public comments for “net metering.” Net metering is an electricity policy for consumers who own, generally small, renewable energy facilities, such as wind or solar power. “Net”, in this context, is used in the sense of meaning “what remains after deductions” — in this case, the deduction of any energy outflows from metered energy inflows. Under net metering, a system owner receives retail credit for at least a portion of the electricity they generate. The ideal has your existing electricity meter spinning backwards, effectively banking excess electricity production for future credit. This process has been effectively enacted with utility companies across the county and could be a very cost benefical to small consumers/producers in Alaska. Please visit and post a comment on the RCA’s website, comments will only be taken until Monday July 28, 2008. The case is R-06-005 and is located on the following page:
https://rca.alaska.gov/RCAWeb/Dockets/DocketDetails.aspx?id=488a99ec-2008-43cc-b466-fd3abeffac93
After many requests for another IMPROV comedy show, ‘Tangled Lines’ will be performing once again at RezArt Coffee House on Saturday, August 2. Two shows, at 7pm and 9pm. ‘Tangled Lines’ is Seward’s #1 Improv Troupe*, and performs short-form Improv, just like ‘Whose Line Is It Anyway’ (only better, because it’s not recorded and mass produced and impersonal and corporate…)
Tickets are available at Resurrect Art Coffee House, $5 in advance or $7 at the door. Bring an odd object that we might use in a scene! *’Tangled Lines’ is Seward’s ONLY Improv Troupe…
July 23, 2008
Seward, Alaska Sporadic Bird Report
Sunrise 5:18 am, sunset 10:48 pm, length of day 17 hours, 30 minutes; tomorrow will be 4 minutes and 28 seconds shorter.
Weather: A light misty rain, low gray clouds with temperatures hovering in the upper 40s. The air is perfumed with lilacs and roses and everything is green including this year’s bumper crop of spruce cones.
In my yard in town:
MARBLED MURRELETS flew over the house this morning at 5 am, calling out loudly, anxious to beat dawn on their commute from the forest to the sea. Sounded like a small flock, perhaps a family group.
Bright yellow and black TOWNSEND WARBLERS fledglings fly from branch to branch in the spruce and willows, peeping incessantly for handouts from harried parents, and occasionally actually find a cranefly or other treat all by themselves. It’s a wonder no predator has picked them off yet as they are so noisy and visible.
VIOLET-GREEN SWALLOW babies still in the deck nest box get louder every day, responding vocally to every motion and vibration in frenzied anticipation. The parents fly in with not-fast-enough food delivery and haul away the white fecal sacs. It won’t be long before they join the rest of the swallows swooping around the neighborhood, fledglings calling out noisily mid air. The sighting of a magpie predator sets all the swallows into a concentrated circle, their calls louder and even higher than usual as they sound the alarm.
CHESTNUT-BACKED CHICKADEES also glean invisible insects from the spruce and willows, calling out in their muted husky voices. PINE SISKINS and ROBINS take turns in the birdbath, regardless of the weather.
Two RUFOUS HUMMINGBIRDS enjoy the lilac and feeder then chase each other at top speed around the yard. The time is quickly approaching for this tiny traveler to migrate up to 2000 miles to Mexico, so every sighting is a special treat. Hummers seen in August and later should be carefully documented as they may be Anna’s or even Costa’s. Keep the feeders clean and full as late as possible.
July 22, 2008
Three families of GADWALL, each with 6 or 7 ducklings spotted at the airport pond. Dozens of peeps, most likely LEAST and WESTERN SANDPIPERS feed in the tide flats and fly in flashing synchrony, already done raising their families and now working their way south. A LINCOLN SPARROW sings his beautiful song as if it were yet spring. CLIFF SWALLOWS flash about grabbing insects mid-air, a real test of binocular skill to follow their dashing aerial acrobatics.
No ARCTIC TERNS were spotted; I believe they have already left on their journey to Antarctica and the tip of South America.
July 20, 2008
PINE GROSBEAK flock in spruce trees at airport. Two GREATER YELLOWLEGS flew overhead, calling “tew-tew-tew!”
Exit Glacier report of a lone GOLDEN EAGLE soaring above the Overlook Trail.
Happy Birding!
Carol Griswold
Sporadic Bird Report reporter
Seward, Alaska
I encourage you to join this well-run forum to check on Seward and other Alaska birding news: AKBirding-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
The Kenai Peninsula Wildlife Viewing Trail Guide is available for free on the web at http://www.kenaipeninsula.org. Individual printed copies can be ordered for $13.90 ($8.95 plus $4.95 S&H) via that web site, or at the Seward Chamber of Commerce.
For more information on how to keep cats indoors, please refer to the American Bird Conservancy website, Cats Indoors at and other informative sites listed under a Google.com search.
Good Morning, Seward! Well this is the first really rainy day the Summer Market has had and we need your support. Annette, the produce lady, called this morning to see if anyone would show up with the rain—I told her yes, and she’s coming, so please show up! It might take her a bit longer to get here, so plan on produce today anytime after 11am. Its a great day for hot grilled reindeer sausage and savory nachos. We’ll set up an extra tent, so you can get out of the rain. Abby Wentworth is back from her trip so she’ll have her earth flags, paintings, silk screen prints, and cards. We’ll try to also have some fresh picked organic herbs today too! Take a look inside the little red house to see local mermaid art and unique gifts. We’re located at 312 5th Ave. (1/2 block north of the library) and open Thursday through Sunday 10am-4pm. Come support our community market. Contact: Joanie 760-815-8498 or thegrazingmoose@gmail.com
Regular Seward City Council Meeting Agenda
Monday, July 28, 2008 at 7:00 p.m.
1. Call To Order
2. Pledge Of Allegiance
3. Roll Call
-
Citizens’ Comments On Any Subject Except Those Items Scheduled For Public Hearing.
-
Approval Of Agenda And Consent Agenda
6. Special Orders, Presentations And Reports
A. Proclamations and Awards
1. Introduction of the 2008 Seward and Obihiro Exchange Students.
B. Borough Assembly Report
C. City Manager’s Report
D. City Attorney Report
E. Chamber of Commerce Report
F. Planning and Zoning Report
7. New Business
A. Resolutions
*1. Resolution 2008-069, Accepting The FY 2008 Rural AED Training Grant.
2. Resolution 2008-070, Authorizing The City Manager To Enter Into A Purchase Agreement For Two 500 KVA Transformers, For A Total Amount Not To Exceed $33,560.00.
3. Resolution 2008-071, Authorizing Pacific Power Products To Facilitate Repairs Of The 1994 Autocar Plow/Sander Truck For An Amount Not-To-Exceed $32,200, And Appropriating Funds.
4. Resolution 2008-072, Approving A Contract With RBC Capital Markets To Provide Underwriter Services For The Sale Of Bonds For The Prison Expansion Project, And Appropriating Funds From Bond Proceeds.
5. Resolution 2008-073, Amending The Contract With Mikunda, Cottrell & Co. To Reflect The Cost Of Implementing New Auditing Standards, And Appropriating Funds.
Read More>
Question: Does Seward have a law regarding open containers of alcohol in public places?
Answer: Yes. City Code 8.05.015 No one shall have an open container containing alcohol in a person’s possession on the public streets, parks or in any other public place.
Fine is $100.00.
Questions, comments, tip suggestions;
coptalk@cityofseward.net
Each time I come to Seward I am faced with the challenge of finding volunteers for my always growing waitlist of kids needing Big Brothers or Big Sisters. The City of Seward, Chamber of Commerce and current Bigs have offered their insight as to where I can go to speak about the program and how it is helping kids in the Seward Community but I need more help! If you know of a business or a group of people that would like to learn more about the program and what it takes to be a Big Brother or Sister please contact me and let me know. I’ve heard every excuse in the book as to why people can’t volunteer, whether it be time issues, family obligations or something else. I am here to tell you that if you have the willingness to be a mentor, one hour a week (if that depending on the program) and are going to stick around Seward for at least a year I would love the chance to talk to you more about Big Brothers Big Sister in Seward. I will be available Monday, August 11th and Tuesday, August 12th if you’d like to get together for a cup of coffee (my treat!) to learn more. Check out the new Big Brothers Big Sisters website to get basic information about the program. (It’s a work in progress so bear with me!) http://www.bbbs.org/site/c.ihLQKZPDLqF/b.3220091/k.BD76/Home.htm
Thank you and I hope to hear from anyone interested in learning more!
Beth Klein (907)263-2029 or beth.klein@bbbs.org
Wedding Celebration!
Being Deeply Loved by Someone gives you Strength
While Loving Someone Deeply gives you Courage
Lao Tzu
Tina McLean and Scott Ruby
Will be married August 9th,
In a private ceremony in Seward.
Join Us Afterwards
for a
Come-and-Go Pot Luck and Picnic
6-9pm
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Lancelot BB
Gary and Armeda Benson’s Home
Lancelot Drive in Camelot
(First Log House on the Right
At the top of the Hill!)
We hope to see you there!
No gifts Please
Tina was a member of the Seward community for the previous 14 years. Throughout those years she worked as a physical therapist for Seward General Hospital, Providence Seward Medical Center and finally as the owner of the former Active Alaskan Physical Therapy. While in Seward she enjoyed being a member of and volunteering for Seward Rotary, Civil Air Patrol, Seward Elks, Chamber of Commerce, The Seward Bear Creek Flood Board, Mt Marathon Race, The Silver Salmon Derby, the Lost Lake Run and many other local sports activities. Tina currently works for Southcentral Foundation as the Home Based Services Physical Therapist for the Alaska Native Peoples.
Scott has lived and worked in Anchorage for the State of Alaska for the past 23 years. He lived in and graduated high school from Whitehorse Canada. He graduated from the University of Fairbanks in 1984. He currently works as the Deputy Director of the Region of Community and Regional Affairs for the State of Alaska. Scott has traveled extensively throughout Alaska providing support to its Native villages and communities.
Scott and Tina met last year while volunteering for the Alaska Fly Fishers Kenai/Russian River Annual Clean Up. Both remain members of the Alaska Fly Fishers. Together they enjoy exploring all of Alaska while hunting, fishing, camping, rafting the Kenai and hiking. They currently live in Anchorage with their two dogs, Nubuck, a Chesapeake Bay Retriever, and Rascal, a Pomeranian. They plan to retire in 2014 and begin traveling throughout the US and Alaska.
There are good american folks in Seward and beyond who sincerely want and believe in sustaining a healthy environment and wildlife. We have a God given duty as caretakers to take care of our environment and the wildlife. For such purposes, clubs and organizations (such as the Sierra Club) have sprouted across the globe. I do believe majority of the club members have very good intentions to promote healthy environment and wildlife. These same members also believe in using the land resources for our day to day needs. Oil is one of those resources we need. The price of oil is affecting every corner of our daily living; food, heating, rent, fuel, travel etc… Yes, it is amazing how much profit the oil giants are making. You will understand why in the next paragraph.Here’s an inside truth about high price of oil clubs/organizations may not inform you of:
According to the US Dept. of Energy, US oil production has fallen approximately 40% since 1985. The decrease in oil production did not happen overnight. It was 23 years of gradual decrease so our american economy would adjust to oil demands. The US Govt. put a choke hold on oil companies to slow down the drilling to accommodate environmentalists (how would you feel if the govt. told your business to stop making profit?). Moratoriums on off-shore and land drilling was placed. This is what the environmentalist wanted and got on a silver platter. They also helped oil giants make big profits by the moratorium. Since 1985, oil production has decreased in half for fears of global warming and rightly so to an extent. Yet the extreme environmentalists still keep telling us that we are the enemy, and that we are behind every horrible thing imaginable under the sun when it comes to destroying our planet. What else can we do to make the extreme environmentalists happy??? Give up our [life, liberty and pursuit of happiness].
I know for certain that Climate Change does occur and in cycles like the human body. This last year, it was the first time in recent history that Kathmandu, Nepal experienced snow. Are we as humans really the cause of Climate Change? Or, is it part of nature? We as americans have accommodated to the environmentalists cause. It’s time that the evironmentalists stop playing politics and help meet our human needs for survival and safety of our great country for our future generation. The burden is on genuine environmentalist folks who do sincerely care about the environment and wildlife to question the core motive and mission of his/her club/ organizations agenda.
Due to staff training, the Library will be closed until 4pm on Thursday, July 24th. The Earthquake Movie showing for that day has been canceled. Our apologies for any inconvenience. We will be open from 4-8pm.
For a moment I am lost in thought. A blank, white, furry piece of cloth has been placed over my head. I still draw breath, though slowly, and yet vision fails me. A baseball bat taps against my ribs, snapping me into focus. Coarse metal runs slick beneath my hands. Sweating. Muscles tense. I breathe faster, heart pounding as suddenly hands from all directions reach out, grabbing me, spinning me. I would swing the bat but cannot move my arms. Faster, I’m going faster, faster and then, all is quiet. All present are still. Waiting on a moment. I move forward, lurch two steps, and swing hard.
Life is never dull at a children’s birthday party. Why, I can think of few more daring tests of skill than can be found right here in this book: Birthday Parties for Children.
Want to practice knocking someone senseless by leaping over their back? Simulate drowning with floating fruit? Or the aforementioned Hit something really hard with a stick blindfolded game? It’s all right here. What I can’t believe is how did they know that people that love danger also really love cake and ice cream? I mean, I could go for some right now, and I love danger!
But seriously, no matter what your current level of enthusiasm at this special, tender moment in a child’s life, when it comes to birthdays, it’s time to put on our game-faces and roar the tiger in the teeth. ‘Cause you’re not gonna win this time clown! I’ll yank that nose right off your face! You don’t scare me anymore! Why I oughta’ I’m talking about clowns again. I’m not supposed to do that anymore. Like it out here. Okay, so deep breaths - one, two, three, and I’m back.
Which reminds me of my next point. Helium kills brain cells. If you thought you’d get off scot-free after all those years of chipmunk-voice-magic-fun, you were wrong. Take a good look at the clown kid. A life on helium is no life at all. Lousy balloon-sniffing makeup bums. Get a hair cut and buy smaller shoes! Don’t you laugh at me! Not this time! Not, not again.
I’m sorry friends, but I don’t think I can go on. Too many memories. So many memories… But hey, don’t let my closet full of skeletons turn you off from a great book. Show those tykes a terrific time on their next special day by stopping by the Library and checking out Birthday Parties for Children. But please, don’t invite you-know-who.
